dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
