U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
