Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Randomize
