So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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