Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
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