butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
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It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
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I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
Guess who just stumbled into work hungover, wearing yesterday's clothes, covered in hickeys and glitter, and carrying a giant bottle of rum in her purse.
I just took plan B at work.
This is the greatest story of all time.
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