Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize