He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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