I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Randomize
