Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
