Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
