I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
