I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Randomize
