Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Randomize