Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
