is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
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