I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
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