how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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