a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
These 19 Guys Hit The Cougar Jackpot
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka