my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
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