Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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