Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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