Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize
