Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
Randomize
