I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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