Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
