Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
I think I sprained my soul last night
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Nobody cheats on THIS.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
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