i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
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