I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
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