Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
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