that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
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