jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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