Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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