Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
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