a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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