there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
