around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Randomize
