AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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