dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
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