I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Randomize