so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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