you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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