i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
