i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
Randomize
