he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
