another moral hangover. fuck.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
Randomize
