Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
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