I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
did you just send me my own nude
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
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