and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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