It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
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