Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Randomize