i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize